I. Am. Exhausted! But in a good way. We went home to Branson this weekend just for the fun of it and to spend time with family. Paxy was getting over a cold and teething so he didn't sleep the best, which meant Mama didn't sleep the best. But we got some major shopping done, which was fun and got to have some great laughs with the fam as always. I absolutely LOVE my family!!! They are the best! I wish I could see them more often though.
Going home is always fun, but it always brings a lot of memories back too. It makes me think about my Mom a lot, which of course makes me miss her even more. For some reason a certain memory stuck out to me more than normal. When we go down to Branson we always drive by Skaggs hospital multiple times. (Mom passed away at Skaggs.) When we drove into Branson Friday night and drove by the hospital, as we passed I looked down the road and could see the exact spot where my Dad met my brother, sister and I to give us the news that she was gone. On that very early morning in May 2001 when Dad gave us the news my 1st reaction was to drop to my knees, lift my hands and start worshiping God through my tears of sorrow. My 1st reaction. I so distinctly remember doing this and how I was feeling at the time. I had always lived a life dedicated to God and had always wanted to serve Him, but in the days leading up to Mom's passing God brought me even closer to Him...probably in preparation for what was to come. So on that morning, I think in that moment I was surrendering everything to Him and choosing to praise Him no matter what life would bring. All of this came flooding back to me this past Friday night as we drove by, as well as every other time we drove by this weekend. I remember being so close to God and I had to ask myself if I was still in that same spot with God or if I had pulled away. The answer is no, I'm nowhere near as dedicated as I was then, but how I long to have that close relationship with Him again...and I've been working on it. There's nothing like it in the world. No earthly relationship could ever even come close to being as awesome as a close relationship with God.
It's hard sometimes to make time for your Maker when the kids are screaming, the house needs cleaned, breakfast, lunch and dinner need to be made and not to mention the enormous pile of laundry that needs washed, folded and put away. However, I KNOW that as I make time for HIM that somehow there will be more time in the day to accomplish all the Mom/Wife stuff. I just have to learn to put Him 1st and let Him be my 1st reaction again...in any situation.
Matthew 6:33 NKJV "But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you."
Ps. 69:32 NKJV "The humble shall see this and be glad; And you who seek God, your hearts shall live."